End of World begins; doomed citizens urged to remain calm
 

The end of Earth and everything we know got underway today after Quim Gil (manager of some as yet unidentified activity in corporate giant Nokia) fulfilled the final prophecy by making an unexpected joke.

The joke, Quim's first and apparently last, was directed at incoming and outgoing maemo.org council members who were quick to express their displeasure.

"Hey, I'm not ready for the end of the world," declared an anonymous representative whom we will not identify as sjgadsby. "I still had some pranks to pull on another anonymous councilperson I will not point out to be General Antilles."

"The person you're not identifying as sjgadsby is an annoying little fairy who puts chocolate in peanut butter and cracker crumbs in people's beds," returned the person not named as General Antilles. "His world deserved to end, but there's no reason the rest of us had to go too. I'm really irritated at this Quim guy. He should have been more selective."

Indeed, as people around the planet headed pointlessly for useless caves, shelters and storefronts with shattered glass, that was a common complaint.

"This guy had gone his entire life avoiding the prophecy," grumbled one looter. "Not a single joke. How hard would it have been to maintain the status quo? Hey... wanna buy a real Rolex?"

Spiritual leaders all over are frantically praying for a break, hoping their combined leverage and unprecedented cooperation will convince God that He has made an error. Most conceded that this task was probably futile.

"God's only admitted to one mistake in His existence," lamented the Pope, "and Mrs. God has not let him forget it. I doubt He will ever confess to another."

No one knows what mechanism will actually cause the final destruction brought on by Quim's seemingly harmless quip, but that isn't what seems to concern most people.

"If we gotta go, we gotta go," sighed a woman who stopped running to the subway in order to catch her breath. "I was up to my eyeballs in debt anyway. Just get it over with."

Re: End of World begins; doomed citizens urged to remain calm
 

was this not supposed to be funny? :D

http://talk.maemo.org/showthread.php?t=28877

EDIT: That post was on 5/9/9

the Antichrist will have power for 3.5 years putting it right about winter soltice in 2012 when the Mayans calendar ended December 21 2012.

Quim is the Antichrist, he will rule for 3 more years. We are all doomed........... :eek::eek::eek::eek:

Re: End of World begins; doomed citizens urged to remain calm
 

Well, there was so much truth in that one it didn't quality. :p

Re: End of World begins; doomed citizens urged to remain calm
 

Are you sure?, I'm telling you its ll clear now :eek:

Re: End of World begins; doomed citizens urged to remain calm
 

Can we get the full text of the prophecy please? I believe it was published under an open license.

Re: End of World begins; doomed citizens urged to remain calm
 

Actually the prophecy is only partially open, but I can get you the API specs to a binary blob...

Re: End of World begins; doomed citizens urged to remain calm
 

Well, thanks for that! Now I have to come up with a new trick to play on Tim.

Re: End of World begins; doomed citizens urged to remain calm
 

Oh, and how I hate cracker crumbs.

Tim

Re: End of World begins; doomed citizens urged to remain calm
 

That's cool Tim. I told Gadsby you prefer nonpariels.