I protest against stating that people living in Australian bush should't be tech savvy.

Seriously though - when it's needed and feasible to recreate USB connections via testpads, IMO best place is where the original port was. But, instead of soldering it to PCB, I would suggest using a little silicone oil on N900's case and PCB part where the port is going to reside, then encapsulate (already soldered etc) port into epoxy putty, the way that it will feel free space in case (thus getting shape of free space), yet it won't be able to get glued into either case or PCB.

This way, one get's similar layout than we have in N900 audio port - is is separate part that doesn't move, because it fills all space around itself, but it isn't "held tight" by anything + it got two elastic wires connecting it to PCB, so it can bend freely (and, in extreme situations, plastic case around it van bend to), without risk of breaking anything, be it PCB or solder. Such concept is practically "indestructible".

/Estel