Interesting, I just have some of the problems mentioned. At first my WH-701 didn't work with any phone, not even my N900. Then I discovered they worked fine, when pulled 1mm out, then they worked ONCE with my N9 flawlessly (not the buttons though) and now they don't work with my N9 again, regardless of "Dolby"-Setting and reboots with or without headset plugged in.

edit: interestingly the N900 detects the plugging-out-process and stops the music, even though it doesn't play through the headphones.