For the record, the only reason I've even entertained this discussion is because generally I find the level of intelligence here to be above par. Normally I would have put such a thread on ignore a long time ago.

Asking someone to not use historically derogatory words in reference to another group is not perpetuating racism. Though I would ask if you have the same opinion when it comes to say Jews. What it is is r-e-s-p-e-c-t. If you are unawares of the history, then this is an opportunity to do the research so you understand. As posted by someone else it is simply a matter of if you're not in the in-group (whatever group that may be) you don't use certain phrases. Per your Feminist angle, I assure you that calling a feminist a ***** (or any woman a "*****" within' earshot of just about any woman) will have rather grave consequences. But for a female to do the same does not carry the same weight. Double standard? Probably, but you know what I have more important things to deal with then why I can't use a certain term under certain circumstances. Really in the end it's not that big a deal for either one of us.