But what if you don't fancy the girl who loves your poem. What can the N900 do in such circumstances?

Could you have a LIKE / DISLIKE option the moment you spot them to send to their device informing them that the writer of the Poem (i.e. You) has just left the building and that the chap they are looking at is really a geeky guy (who hates poetry) and that you wouldn't be interested in anyway.

Also, could it then send them GPS co-ordinates to the local launderette and a message telling them to run quickly outside and they would find the Poet?

Perhaps a Brainstorm?