Unfortunately, the people the declare other folks whiners don't usually have any answers.

In this case, I do not either; but I will be honest about it. I've used a N900 for the better part of June and April and I witnessed exactly what you're seeing. I had to reboot to get the phone to avoid that 1-3 day slow-down, which will add to this problem I've noticed - and to be honest, I had to uniformly pick up the phone.

It's all a habit now, but those things I did to avoid. Is it a problem? For some, yes it is. Should it be fixed? Yes. Do I have the answer? No. Will I commiserate with you? Hell yeah.

That and a couple of other minor reasons that I've pontificated enough times in the past forced my hand to delay purchasing the N900.

Good luck. And take the time out to search for the other alike threads on this subject. There might have been a possible solution in them - I didn't find any though.

Edit: Two great answers are above my non-answer.